Kenís Love Story
Jean was my landlord. I met her as I went to pick up the
keys to my new apartment. I was moving in downstairs from her. We met each
other and there was a little bit of a spark. I moved in and we were talking
about this that and the other. She had three children. Danica, the daughter
and the oldest, as well as the twin boys, Daniel and Jonathon. Great little
There was a lot of innuendo that went on here and there.
Finally, she came out and said, "Before anything ever happens, I want to
tell you something."
I said, "Well, what is that?"
She says, "Well, Iím HIV positive"
"It means I have AIDS"
"All right, go ahead"
"You donít grasp the gravity of the situation."
"Yes I do grasp the gravity of the situation. Basically,
it doesnít bother me." At that point I had gone through a lot of life and
death and this and that and the other. My mother had terminal cancer for
six years and Iíd seen a lot of friends go, and I was losing my mother
and it was a long drawn out process. So, I had come to know death pretty
well at that time.
I said , "I have very strong feelings for you and Iím
not going to throw this away. Even if I only have a year or five years,
itís better to have loved and lost than to have never loved at all." We
were sitting at the table, holding hands. And then we kissed. It was the
most electrifying experience Iíve ever had. There arenít really words to
describe what it felt like. Like your first kiss. Your first bite of ice
cream when youíre a kid. Your first jelly bean. Your first tickle fest
with an uncle. I hope I never lose that. I still have that now.
It was one of those things I just knew it was meant to
be. I just knew it. We both knew it. We both wanted to take things slowly,
but it didnít progress that way. It was like a snowball. Like a love snowball
it was just rolling down the hill and as it rolled we were just swept up
into it. It was liked being wrapped up into positive emotion it was like
being wrapped up in love. It was the most natural progression was for me
to move out and into her place.
Her positive attitude gets me through every single day.
Every day could be my last. I live for every moment. With
Jean, sheís taught me to live life to itís fullest. That every day could
be your last. You have to spend time with your children and your loved
ones. I try to spend more time at home than I do at work. I am not a workaholic.
I have too much in my life with my children and with my family and with
my homelife. Any moment I miss with them is not a moment Iím going to be
able to make up. I could make better money than I make now, I could do
this, I could do that, and the other. Thatís all fine and dandy. But money
I can make up, time I canít. Jeanís condition has made me live life more
to itís fullest.
Our son, Roland, was born with his motherís antibodies.
While most children (with proper medication) revert after 2 years, that
was a scary thing. And then he got sick. It turned out only to be a stomach
flu. But he got so thin, and we thought the worst. I have nightmares still
about that. About losing my son, and losing Jean.
This hasnít been a curse. I think itís been a blessing.
Jean feels the same way. It just opens your eyes. You see how may things
that are out there and how many things that are petty. That used to bother
you that were really, really petty. You know driving down the road, somebody
cuts you off, yada yada yada, give them the finger. No, time is too short
for that. "Hey, okay go ahead. Iíll take my time. Iíll move over here into
the slow lane."
The main thing people should know is these people have
a lot to give. Even more so. These people have a lot more love to give
because they know they can only give that love for a short period of time.
So theyíre going to give it to their best. Theyíre going to give it to
their fullest. From my personal experience, itís a showing of love that
you canít afford to miss. Iíve got Jean, Roland, Danica, Daniel, and Jonathon.
Iíve got a positive attitude about life that I never had before by looking
death in the face. Itís a contradiction in terms, I think, but thatís the
payoff. Iíve got a positive attitude, me , about life.
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